Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Class-y Folks

Some randoms from class time! Only Tuesday nights because clearly we're the best night! (Or maybe because no one else collects quotes...)

Kiss my distal colon! - Tammy

But Terry Simons said I need to do more front crosses! - Jenilee
Well Terry Simons can kiss my ass! - Sarah

Everyone in this class has small boobs - Sarah
We're the itty bitty titty committee! - Jenilee

You guys suck! - Sarah/Amanda

Did all your brains fall out your asses tonight? - Amanda
That would be called a prolapse - Tammy
That would be a TLC medical mysteries style prolapse - Amanda S.

Can I just try... - Amanda S.
No. - Amanda

Ruh! Ruh! - Gyp

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Go! See Spot! Fly! Camp 2012

This was our first year having an agility camp. Two days of agility, alcohol, hotness, and fun followed by a one day trial! Most of us were participating in it so not many quotes were logged, maybe that's a good thing in the long run ;) If you read this and have any to add, let me know!

What the fuck am I? The shit queen? - Jolayne

What kind of flexi is this? It's like a welfare flexi! - Amanda

I think my legs are a little spread. - Andrea

The best thing about being an athletic therapist is that you can make yourself a tampon - Kyle

Those ones that go across the stream, they're just looking for attention. If they go up the river then they're serious. - Kyle

As I said, it was tons of fun! Sarah even got dunked and we invented our own signature cocktail. 

The ingredients are all there (except the Mtn. Dew) so feel free to make this masterpiece at home!
No one here is normal. No one.

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Boobs and Balls

Another trial this weekend and there was quite a bit of funny, enjoy!

You get stupid and they're gone. - Dave (in reference to Flash's testicles)

Flash likes hard balls. - Jan

We'll put you in a box in the garage. - Sarah

I'm not fun *hangs head in shame* -Jaime

I have boob sweat! That's how fun I was! - Jaime

Is anything with a penis ever good? - Jaime

My goodness I have a dirty boob! - Tammy

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Miscellaneous Quotes

I want you to run like your ass is on fire! - Jolayne

Guess what I shaved today - Michelle

The dog was fat and had long nails, but I'm not judging - Jolayne

We are way too bitchy to be here, Kim should have taught for us - Amanda

I'm so confused! I'm on DayQuil and I can't think right! - Amanda S

Monday, February 13, 2012

Another Trial Weekend!

The Calgary Agility Association trial was this weekend and it was full of awesome quotes... and apparently lots of crotch talk.

It's not a vision, it's a reality - Sarah to Amanda S. on visualizing Kaleb being a jerk.

I thought it was a figure skater but she has no skates on - Sarah 

Dogs are better than kids, if you don't like them you can shoot them - As heard in the washroom.

At least it's not in my crotch - Jan

It's amazing how things stiffen up over the years.
Yeah, but not the right things. - Overheard on a walk through.

How big do you think 10 inches is? - Darcy to Sarah and Jo.

Wow my crotch is hairy. - Sarah

Bzzzzt! - Sarah, Amanda S.

Don't beat me! - Sarah, Jo, Amanda S.

There's never a good time for crotch sniffing... I mean cross-stitching!- Amanda S. on fashion.

Snort - Sarah

Monday, February 6, 2012

They Call Her the Streak

This weekend the No Nonscents Scenthurdle team travelled to Calgary for the Alberta Kennel Club dog show. It was a long day but everyone had a ton of fun and lots of laughs! Here are some of the memorable quotes.

Are you an exhibitionist? - Guys at the admission table to Sarah

God, look at his balls! - Roberta on Mastiff testicles

Quit sniffing penises! - Amanda

That's awkward. - Sarah on Epic humping the Cardigan puppy

I rehabilitate dogs and train people. - Sarah's impression of Cesar Milan

Check out the No Nonscents blog for more info on Scenthurdle and the No Nonscents team!

Monday, January 30, 2012

On Meat and Agility

Terry Simons of Flying Dog Agility came to our club to do a seminar with us this past weekend and it was super fun and informative! I don't think anyone left without something to work on. However when you get a bunch of agility people, some tequila, and some exhaustion all in one arena together, hilarity ensues.

I took my dogs wieners out this morning and they were still hard. Sometimes a hard wiener isn't a good thing.- Jaime

What ever happened to positive reinforcement? - Shannon
That's for the dogs. - Amanda

Why is your favourite colour red? - Terry Simons 
Because its the colour of blood! - Sarah 

This big piece of meat is a lot to handle!  - Jaime

You will beat them and they will hate you. - Terry Simons

Jaime is motivated by the meat. - Sarah

Jo's pole dancing. - Sarah

Put your bum on the wing like this! - Terry Simons

Maybe you need a bigger ass. - Amanda 

Put your crack on the wing!  
- Terry Simons

Your penis is dirty! - Anneli

I'm going to Disneyland to get some boobs. - Sarah 

Give me back my meat I'm going to stick it in the tunnel. - Jaime

Thanks for the great weekend guys, you all were a riot!